If we can pause, we create space. Space to breathe, to think, to be without acting.
The pause is the answer to so many of our problems. Such a small thing, and so powerful.
To develop the pause, notice your next urge. Is it an urge to go check something online? Or eat something you know isn’t healthy for you? Pay attention to the urge, learn as much as you can about it. If you act on it after the pause, that’s OK. Just notice it, and pause, and pay attention.
Do it again for the next urge, and the next. You will get good at it with practice, and you’ll have lots of opportunities to practice.
The key is to just pause… not to try to change your behavior.
Lately I’ve started to believe that behavior change is about 98 parts attention (aka pause), 1 part self-judgment, and 1 part effort. Of course self-judgment should stay low, but effort is the one that tries to sneak in all the time. Let effort emerge naturally from attention, not from other parts of your will.